How To Find The Right Online Dating Service
The first thing you have to know when trying to understand
how to find the right online dating service is what you want. Do you want Mr.
Right Now, Ms. Right, or even just someone nice to add to your circle of
friends? Don't forget to ask yourself how you know when you've found what
you're looking for.
Next, figure out who you are. Not only because you're going
to have to sell yourself, but because you're going to have to convince someone
else to sell themselves to you. And that's before you meet in person. But you
also want to know where to start searching.
There are, of course, the general dating sites: a huge mix
of everyone, but perhaps with a slight leaning to one kind of politics or
worldview. I'd call these places of last resort because they take a lot more
messages to narrow your choices down into what you want. The up side is you may
run across someone who is a bit outside what you thought you wanted, but ends
up being what you really need.
Even so, the first places to look are the more specialized
sites. There are sites that cater to people of specific religions -- Judaism, Hindu,
Christian, Atheist -- and specific political affiliations -- Democrat,
Republican, Libertarian, Green -- and certainly those that work the
"alternative" lifestyle angle -- gay, bisexual, STD positive, and
even specific kinks and fetishes.
And certainly there are sites for people honest (or crazy)
enough to say all they really want is sex with someone of the opposite (or
same) sex. Guys usually outnumber girls on these sites and beware the numerous
ads from escorts (of both sexes) pretending to be average Joes and Janes, but
actually looking to make money off other people's loneliness and sexual desire.
Unless you're looking to pay for it, but then why would you be on a
"dating" site to begin with?
Now that you know how to find the right online dating
service you need to understand guys and girls should set up their profiles
differently. Guys, like the rest of life, you'll be doing most of the chasing.
Write your profile like you expect it to be read after you contacted someone.
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For women, being pretty counts less online, but it can still
warp things. One study suggests that blond hair is worth the same as a college
degree. If you refuse to describe yourself physically, guys with confidence
will think you're hot and hiding it and work to get to know you. And great guys
with less confidence won't be intimidated to approach you.
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